Cats Can Make or Break a Relationship

Cats are instinctively aware of those who don?t really like them, even if the human tries to fake friendly feelings in order to build a relationship with the owner. Have you ever noticed how cats seem to sense one?s true feelings about them?  No matter how cat haters try to brush off the cat, it returns to gently paw at the person?s face or circle and curl in the lap of the human in question, just to prove a point.  Within a few moments, the person who claimed they liked cats is pushing the cate aside and trying to come up with a new alibi to avoid the creature altogether.  That?s when the old ?I?m allergic? excuse comes into play.  Sure, the cat hears the human?s snorts and sneezes suddenly developing when the human actually sees the cat.  The behavior is a familiar ploy, and kitty is even more determined that the potential romance between its owner and the visitor be immediately nipped in the bud.      

If that doesn?t work and the cat suspects a true relationship may be taking place, it?s time to pull out the big guns.  Desperate times call for desperate measures, and cats can be merciless when it comes to claiming their turf.  I once had a huge orange tabby tom named Baby.  Although Baby spent the better percent of his time prowling the neighborhood, he would check in at home to grab a quick bite and catch up on the news.  I had just begun dating my first husband, but Baby had not met him as yet.  It was only our third date, still well within the best behavior period of our courtship, when Baby arrived on the scene. 

It just so happened that my date, Ken, was one of those fakers I was talking about earlier, and Baby could smell his deceit a mile away.  Ken commented on how big and handsome the cat was, but Baby wasn?t impressed.  He immediately walked up to Ken, circled him and sprayed him up one pant leg and down the other.  If you?re a cat owner, you have experienced the potent smell of cat urine, especially if your cat is an unneutered outdoor male. 

Even before Ken felt the warmth of Baby?s discharge, it was immediately apparent that Baby took offense to Ken?s presence and wanted that tom evicted from his home.  Ken glared down and began swearing, but Baby stared him down.  Instead of running away, Baby was planning his second wave of attack.  Next the claws came out and Baby rebounded off Ken?s chest, causing him to stumble into a sitting position on the sofa and now Baby had better access to the exposed flesh of his neck.  Like a jungle cat, I could see Baby was coming in for the kill.  I was desperate to stop the carnage.  I stepped between the two toms and began screaming at Baby.  Mom got the squirt bottle, and both boys were thoroughly soaked.  Although it broke up the fight, tempers hadn?t cooled one bit.

Our last resort was to get the broom.  Baby feared the broom like a bull fears the ring.  If someone accidentally left the broom sitting by Baby?s food dish, he would wearily circle it and loudly hiss.  You would think he had been beaten by a broom, and who knows what may have happened when Baby was out on one of his neighborhood adventures.  As for us, we would never have done such a thing to Baby had he not been threatening our guest.  At this point, Ken was lying on the sofa with his belly exposed like an injured wildebeest.  Baby sensed his surrender, and rushed in to finish him off just as Mom came to Ken?s rescue with the dreaded broom.